Wednesday, July 06, 2005
Rachael Ray
There are a few shows I watched on the Food Network. Unwrapped I like, and Good Eats is a good show. Alton Brown is the host of Good Eats, a male, so he actually knows what he's doing in the kitchen. He doesn't just show you how to make a recipe but explains why foods work the way they do in cooking. On occassion I've been caught up watching this femme named Rachael Ray who hosts a couple of shows on Food Network, $40 a day and 30 minute meals. I have no idea if she's a competent cook, since she's a she, I doubt it. I haven't been caught up watching because of some recipe she's making since the few I've seen have all been pretty unappetizing to me. Even brownies, which you would think you couldn't mess up, she's making them and tosses USED coffee grounds in them. Ugh.
What is so fascinating is she's perky. Overly perky. Always perky. It can't possibly get any perkier than she is. I stare at the TV wondering if she is REALLY like that. In the back of my head I'm imagining the moment the cameras go out she turns into Leona Helmsley and starts screaming at all the staff, but if that's true wouldn't I have heard about it in the National Enquirer? And if this is some sort of genetic mutation then scientist need to grab some DNA from her, find which of those 18 quintillion segments is the opposite of the rest of the female population, and sneak in a gene correction for all the other women.
It's frightening though, I can imagine she could be that Hansel and Gretal witch slicing up, cooking, and serving a couple of children, and all the while go about doing it with the same perkiness she does with Italian Mac and Cheese.
What is so fascinating is she's perky. Overly perky. Always perky. It can't possibly get any perkier than she is. I stare at the TV wondering if she is REALLY like that. In the back of my head I'm imagining the moment the cameras go out she turns into Leona Helmsley and starts screaming at all the staff, but if that's true wouldn't I have heard about it in the National Enquirer? And if this is some sort of genetic mutation then scientist need to grab some DNA from her, find which of those 18 quintillion segments is the opposite of the rest of the female population, and sneak in a gene correction for all the other women.
It's frightening though, I can imagine she could be that Hansel and Gretal witch slicing up, cooking, and serving a couple of children, and all the while go about doing it with the same perkiness she does with Italian Mac and Cheese.
