Sheepville

We've been suffering like the rest of the U.S. as it's been crawling into the low 80s almost every day here. Yesterday after 25 straight days of sun we finally did get some rain though, .05" to be exact, and it stayed in the low 70s. I think we're back to 83/84 this weekend though with just more sun. Nights at least are just barely tolerable as it consistently dips down into the 60s. Every day I get home from work the apartment is like 79/80 degrees and it takes at least a half hours for the AC to get it cooled down. Fall will be here soon.

I seem to have had one relative, a Mr S.U. Seamster who lived in Lome-Toga, die in a car accident on 4/7/1999 and he was worth $18.4 million. Amazingly a mere three minutes later another windfall email came in notifying me a Mr P.A. Seamster worth $28.5 million died in a car accident when arriving for a holiday to Lome on 9/29/2002. After collecting my millions, I'll definitely avoid travelling to Lome as it seems millionaire Seamsters don't fare well there.

This is something I can find downstairs. You can go to http://www.durianpalace.com/ and read all about this wonderful fruit. They spend much of the first page trying to say such phrases as "rotten onions with limburger cheese and low-tide seaweed" describing its smell are unwarranted. It's also noted that "It is this characteristic super-fast deterioration of durian fragrance in a closed space that has led to the banning of durians in many public places in Southeast Asia, such as hotels, buses, and airplanes." Dude, if it's illegal it's because it has more stink than a coon dog has fleas.

Jerry, my co-worker, opened a container the other day that had durian fruit in it. In short order everyone in the office was checking their shoe bottoms. Les, another co-worker, wasn't in that day, so yesterday when he came in I knew he should be introduced to the fragrant durian too. I emailed Jerry to grab his container out of the fridge and set it over beside me. I waited, about 30 seconds, and Les, who was talking to one of the techs, stops mid-sentence and whirls around with an audible *whoosh* and gives me a look like I broke wind in church during a moment of silence. I howled, Jerry falls over onto the floor, Les lets out a string of expletives, and Dee and Steve rush out to ask us to check our shoes. I wished afterwards I had a camera to catch that stunned, yet pained, look Les gave me.

I'm sure God placed our nostrils where he did as a last second warning device for things we are about to put in our mouths. Maybe these things do "taste like heaven", but what idiot would have ever let them pass by their nostrils to stick in their mouth to find out in the first place?

FAYETTE, Ala. - A 20-year-old whose lawyers claimed the video game “Grand Theft Auto” and childhood abuse caused him to kill three small-town police officers was convicted Tuesday of capital murder.

The victims’ families have filed a civil suit against the video game manufacturer and two stores, claiming Moore killed the three after repeatedly playing “Grand Theft Auto III” and “Grand Theft Auto: Vice City.” No trial date has been set in the civil lawsuit.

Bonnie and Clyde were killers long before video games came along. If people really think that a video game caused someone to go out and kill and not that the person WAS JUST FREAKING NUTS then they're just as nuts as the murderer was. These people kill because they were a sandwich short of a picnic, not because they played a video game or watched some movie. But people would much rather profit from something like this, so they use it as an excuse to sue.

One of the biggest opponent groups to things like violence in video games is the church. What I want to know is when are we going to start suing the church for all the people they are responsible for having been murdered. First, all of those people that heard the voice of the devil (or Jesus, or thought they were Jesus) who told them to off someone. I think all of the Christian denominations should cough up money for those victim's families. All those Muslim extremist using Islam as their excuse to kill, they owe a lot of countries some money. More people have been murdered in the name of religion than about any other reason.

I agree with what Prime Minister Blair is doing. Some Muslim extremist priest that's been freeloading off of British welfare for years is out inciting and promoting violence against Britain. He should be deported, and in a body bag would probably be okay too. Most Muslims are a peaceful people, so are most Christians. Everyone should be allowed to practice whatever religion they choose. Those extremist who abuse their religion, whether it's Al-Qeda or the KKK, and promote religious or racial intolerence, should be shot.

Japanese people hoping their bank accounts carry a bit more cash could see their hopes come true with an ATM that doubles as a slot machine, a regional bank said Wednesday. Ogaki Kyoritsu Bank, based in Ogaki city, some 300 kilometers (185 miles) west of Tokyo, will on Aug. 8 introduce slot games that run during the wait as cash machines process transactions.

And people think there is a gambling problem in America?

A team of divers are searching at the bottom of the Baie des Ha! Ha! in northeastern Canada for 800 kilograms (1,700 pounds) of cheddar sunk by an entrepreneur hoping to revolutionize cheese making. "A few years ago, a fisherman came to us and said he'd found a piece of Boivin cheese at the bottom of a lake where he'd been diving. He took it, hesitated, ate it and told us it was one of the best cheeses he'd ever eaten," dairy owner Luc Boivin told AFP.

The story goes on to note how they are having a hard time finding it now. I know Canadians aren't known as the scholars of the world, but should one of them have realized by now the only thing they revolutionized was fish feeding?

Indonesian surgeons have delivered a 27-year-old baby from a middle-aged housewife who had carried the dead body inside her because she was too poor to have it removed, doctors said Wednesday. A team of 15 doctors operated for three hours on Tuesday to retrieve the 1.6-kilogram (3.5-pound) petrified baby from the 54-year-old woman, identified as Taminah, at the Sutomo general hospital in the Java island city of Surabaya.

And American women complain about a mere 9 months?

Former U.S. president Bill Clinton, who was visiting Kenya Friday, will probably never hear about it, but he's being offered 20 head of cattle and 40 goats for the hand of his daughter in marriage. The 36-year-old bachelor, Godwin Kipkemoi Chepkurgor, has waited five years after writing to the president and vows to remain unmarried until he gets an answer.

I remember what Chelsea looked like, and at best she'll grow up looking like her mother. Personally I think he should take the deal. Besides, it's a much better deal than the one offered for Amy Carter years ago. That was just a few goats.