Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Durian
This is something I can find downstairs. You can go to http://www.durianpalace.com/ and read all about this wonderful fruit. They spend much of the first page trying to say such phrases as "rotten onions with limburger cheese and low-tide seaweed" describing its smell are unwarranted. It's also noted that "It is this characteristic super-fast deterioration of durian fragrance in a closed space that has led to the banning of durians in many public places in Southeast Asia, such as hotels, buses, and airplanes." Dude, if it's illegal it's because it has more stink than a coon dog has fleas.
Jerry, my co-worker, opened a container the other day that had durian fruit in it. In short order everyone in the office was checking their shoe bottoms. Les, another co-worker, wasn't in that day, so yesterday when he came in I knew he should be introduced to the fragrant durian too. I emailed Jerry to grab his container out of the fridge and set it over beside me. I waited, about 30 seconds, and Les, who was talking to one of the techs, stops mid-sentence and whirls around with an audible *whoosh* and gives me a look like I broke wind in church during a moment of silence. I howled, Jerry falls over onto the floor, Les lets out a string of expletives, and Dee and Steve rush out to ask us to check our shoes. I wished afterwards I had a camera to catch that stunned, yet pained, look Les gave me.
I'm sure God placed our nostrils where he did as a last second warning device for things we are about to put in our mouths. Maybe these things do "taste like heaven", but what idiot would have ever let them pass by their nostrils to stick in their mouth to find out in the first place?
Jerry, my co-worker, opened a container the other day that had durian fruit in it. In short order everyone in the office was checking their shoe bottoms. Les, another co-worker, wasn't in that day, so yesterday when he came in I knew he should be introduced to the fragrant durian too. I emailed Jerry to grab his container out of the fridge and set it over beside me. I waited, about 30 seconds, and Les, who was talking to one of the techs, stops mid-sentence and whirls around with an audible *whoosh* and gives me a look like I broke wind in church during a moment of silence. I howled, Jerry falls over onto the floor, Les lets out a string of expletives, and Dee and Steve rush out to ask us to check our shoes. I wished afterwards I had a camera to catch that stunned, yet pained, look Les gave me.
I'm sure God placed our nostrils where he did as a last second warning device for things we are about to put in our mouths. Maybe these things do "taste like heaven", but what idiot would have ever let them pass by their nostrils to stick in their mouth to find out in the first place?
