Friday, June 27, 2008
Supreme Court and more advice
Supreme Court made a couple of great decisions yesterday. First, all of us should own a gun unless you're mental or a felon. Second, they let Exxon off the hook for 2.5 billion for that oil spill almost 20 years ago. It wasn't their fault they had a drunk at the wheel. Now if they'd just overturn that pesky Roe vs Wade.
Another "advice" MSN article today from a Mattilda Schneiderman noting "6 secret guy turn ons." And I thought the rumor was men didn't understand women?
1. He loves that you indulge at dinnertime - Here's a woman telling you to take advantage of the guy and order the most expensive thing on the menu. NOT. Men love it when they indulge in a salad. You order expensive food and in quantities we consider this a warning sign.
2. He loves your occasional obscenities - You think we love it when you scream and curse at us? Again, this is a warning sign that "occasional" is going to move to every day nagging once you buy the cow.
3. He loves that you aren’t a neat freak - Only if he's a slob so it doesn't matter what his place looks like when she's over and when he's there he doesn't have to worry about messing up the place. The girl has however removed herself as a potentional lifetime mate because she will be expected to keep the place clean once married.
4. He loves your extra padding - Yeah, right, sure. There's a reason why we don't have a correct answer for, "Does this dress make me look fat?" We don't want extra padding because as soon as you get there you start asking this question for everything you wear and from that point on it's a doomed relationship.
5. He’s fascinated by your knowledge of medieval tapestries - Umm, no, we aren't. We realize in the dating phase you feign interest in our interests. After saying "I do" we realize you will no longer want to go fishing, camping, duck hunting, golfing, bowling, or to strip clubs. We on the other hand didn't feign interest in medieval tapestries, art galleries, shopping malls, or romance novels during the dating phase and still care nothing about your interests and knowledge base about them afterwards. What turns us on is a woman that is just smart enough to operate a vacuum cleaner but dumb enough to think that Cheerios are donut seeds.
6. He loves a good head rub from you - Okay, one out of six were right.
Another "advice" MSN article today from a Mattilda Schneiderman noting "6 secret guy turn ons." And I thought the rumor was men didn't understand women?
1. He loves that you indulge at dinnertime - Here's a woman telling you to take advantage of the guy and order the most expensive thing on the menu. NOT. Men love it when they indulge in a salad. You order expensive food and in quantities we consider this a warning sign.
2. He loves your occasional obscenities - You think we love it when you scream and curse at us? Again, this is a warning sign that "occasional" is going to move to every day nagging once you buy the cow.
3. He loves that you aren’t a neat freak - Only if he's a slob so it doesn't matter what his place looks like when she's over and when he's there he doesn't have to worry about messing up the place. The girl has however removed herself as a potentional lifetime mate because she will be expected to keep the place clean once married.
4. He loves your extra padding - Yeah, right, sure. There's a reason why we don't have a correct answer for, "Does this dress make me look fat?" We don't want extra padding because as soon as you get there you start asking this question for everything you wear and from that point on it's a doomed relationship.
5. He’s fascinated by your knowledge of medieval tapestries - Umm, no, we aren't. We realize in the dating phase you feign interest in our interests. After saying "I do" we realize you will no longer want to go fishing, camping, duck hunting, golfing, bowling, or to strip clubs. We on the other hand didn't feign interest in medieval tapestries, art galleries, shopping malls, or romance novels during the dating phase and still care nothing about your interests and knowledge base about them afterwards. What turns us on is a woman that is just smart enough to operate a vacuum cleaner but dumb enough to think that Cheerios are donut seeds.
6. He loves a good head rub from you - Okay, one out of six were right.
